Once I was on-the-go, wasn't hurting for money, had the look, the partying nights, all that stuff, but all through it, I always longed for what I have now. I can never forget that.

How many of those women who are holding blackberries would rather be holding an infant? How many of them are too busy trying to arrange meetings and agendas to have a good time? How many of them, rather than wiping a little one's ass, are instead kissing the ass of a grumpy, mean-spirited, unappreciative boss?

Meaning, are they where they are at, by choice or by necessity? Maybe they are putting family on hold to have career first, but it doesn't mean it's their desire.

Most likely, if I was in the middle of a big city like Chicago right now, I would be feeling differently, but it's ironic because I'm writing a post right now about how I am done with the city life.

The hustle and the bustle. The having to get all fancied up to impress people. I remember that. I remember being resentful that what's inside should be what impresses, not what I'm wearing or how I look.

I have been getting a bit more 'me' time, so I can competely understand the need for that. But mine has been a return to my books. I didn't realize how much I missed them so, until last week, I got to go alone to the bookstore. I almost cried, just being able to walk up and down the aisles and read all the jackets and get to focus on the book, not the little child trying to run all around. Sigh.

Just curling up on the couch (in my baggy sweats) and going away again, to different worlds, that's my me time. Boring, I know.

I know what you're feeling, about the 'me' time. It's been my perception though, that the city doesn't appreciate the 'me' of a person, but rather the presentation of 'me'. Quite a big difference, but that was just my experience.

I do hope you get some me time. We all need it every now and then.

I know its not always green on the other side of the septic tank.

I just needed to vent with Parita being sick and cranky for over two weeks, Aayan with his failed potty training and now this likely move to Boston for a month and then finally back to India. The pressure put me in a rather bitchie mood.

I'm hoping to have some 'me' time when I visit my mom in Delhi. Leave the kids with her and go out for dinner and a movie with Aaman or visit a spa for a full day treatment.

That in my mind will be pure heaven and then finally go back to our home in Bangalore for a year or two.

well you definitely need some 'me' time long before then. Maybe one day a week or two, you all can find a sitter or a drop off daycare that has credentials.

In terms of the city life or the country life, it's a personal thing and I don't want to knock city life, for someone who wants it. There are some people who would go crazy in the country life that I now seek. There is no right or wrong here, I just wanted to say that.

Anyway, you do need your me time. I get mine now while Kristin is in preschool. She's gone for 4 hours. It's really not enough time to get anything done, but it's enough time to keep me from going crazy.

There are daycare centers that take drop offs. Keep in mind that Aayan probably needs it as much as you do. It can help prepare him for preschool. You might even end up staying there with him for a time or two until you can slip out for awhile, but remember it's as much for him as for you.

Good tip about drop offs. Since we will probably be moving to Boston for a month or two thats exactly what we will do.

Aayan needs to be around kids more often. Better still he needs time away from his mommy

Why would you be envious of your "sisters" for the most superficial reasons possible? (overpriced hang bags and clothing.)

And when does anyone truly think only of themselves? Even if we don't have a "significant other" or children, we often have to "think" about our family and friends.

Reading the words "when all I thought about was me" came across as really self-absorbed. But I'm sure that's not what you meant.

Haasim, I was just venting- lets see- my little angles are going through some tough stages in their lives and I am riding it rough along with them.

Parita is teething and was pretty sick till last week. Aayan refuses to get potty trained and has now started throwing the worst kinds of tantrums.He throws himself on the ground and refuses to get up. Learnt it from some kid in a book shop

To top it all I am now in the middle of two moves- one temporary and another permanent for a few months.

The price of an expat life is not being able to take care of oneself or not having a support structure to fall back on when times get tough.

The women I mentioned seemed to have their act together whereas I seemed to barely holding it together. And I blame that feeling on the struggles I have been going throw with my babies.

I love my family more than anything in this world but I do need some time to myself.

And the only time I got to be self-absorbed before marriage was when it came to hogging the bathroom and I still tend to be possessive about my loo- time ;)