Is there really a state were on can live happily ever after? or for that matter can one be on a permanent high for the rest of one's life? I know for sure that I don't. There have been three times in my life when I had been the happiestin my entire 30 years of existence, when I got married and delivered my two angels but in all those instances along with the happiness came a searing pain, a fear that overshadowed my happiness, that made me look over my shoulder; it didn't feel right. It was as if I did not have the right to feel that heady rush of excitement. It felt as if I was rushing towards the edge of a cliff and could plummet into the dark abyss at any given moment.

Happiness, for me atleast cannot be measured by the headyness of a new love, winning a lottery, buying a solitare or going on a mad shopping spree, it got more to do with living my daily life in a content state where I enjoy good health, good relationships with those around me and am at ease with myself.

Obviously, in life there really are no happily ever afters in terms of being on a high without mary jane 24/7 so when we can't or as in my case don't want to live in perpectual excitement , then, is being content akin to leading a happily ever after or am I just fooling myself and falling into a rut?;)