Things That Bang

Recently a woman was indicted for selling rape, molestation and snuff stories involving children under the obscenity laws.. According to Prof Hellman the creator of the obscenity laws- The worry is that people will be aroused and do awful things based on obscene work

While I understand that in terms of morality what the woman did was wrong ie catering to pedophiles in all likelihood but herein lies the big question - Can we be persuaded to believe that the thoughts penned by a writer could lead normal sane people to commit heinous acts? Isnt it an understood thing that only those who are latently/mentally disturbed can be swayed to do deviant acts? And how much can one curb the freedom of speech based on the fear that it might somewhere some how have an adverse effect on the weak minded?

He further remarked- The legal definition of obscenity embraces both "description," as in text, and "depiction," as in images, he said.

Does that mean that we ban - Mein Kampf, Lolita, Catcher In The Rye or for that matter My Experiments With The Truth since Gandhi talked about sleeping in the same bed with his teenage nieces on either sides?

There are numerous books written about kids having affairs with adults. Take Anne Rice's Mayfair series were a nublie 14 year old girl seduces a 40 something old man. Should we burn her on the stake too?

I find the woman's activities to be repugnant and yet believe that the prosecutors would have a hard time making the case stick since the stories were purely fiction and no pictures or videos of actual kids was involved.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:24 AM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

After living in Bangalore for the past three months I have become darker than the Gingerbread Man. The loss of my smooth creamy complexion has been a source of witty conversation amongst those who know me, add a few spinkle of pimples thanks to the pollution and most people are now giving me tons of advice on what to do to regain my formal glory.

I get the pimple aspect but whats the deal with being so obsessed with having a light skin? People living down South and here in the North are obsessed with skin tone. Now I find that it is not an Indian phenomena but the Chinese too want to be 'Fair and Lovely'.

And, here I thought they were the fairest and creamest of them all.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 08:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

To most Indians jewelry means lots of gold, emeralds, diamonds , rubies etc. Talk to the post colonial generation about jewelry and they would talk about investment in gold and showing off during marriages. My generation on the other hand has come to recognise the fabulous custome jewelry that is unaffordable for college goers but is generally worn by those now in their thirties and forties.

Unfortunately most of the stuff available here in India is mundane and boring. Its either garish or same old rip off of traditional gold jewelry.

So where does one get to buy good designer jewelry?

Shruti on her site Artyenworld has put up such mouth watering fabulous stuff that I cannot wait to lay my hands on it or interview her about it (which hopefully I will be able to do in a couple of days).

The price is a little steep from the Indian standpoint but understandable as her raw materials are all imported. Priceless outstanding stuff.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

An Iowa Woman found a drowned bat in her tea mug from which she had been sipping the whole day. Yuck!! That's why one should use disposable cups.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 02:52 AM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

The only thing I had on my mind while I was slogging my arse during my Masters was studies. There was no time to snuggle in the back seat of a car with the cute guy who took French lessons right across my class or to even think about sex.

But it seems I was in the minority then and continue to be one of the few not to have done it or experimented while in my twenties. Ciaria Fernandes talks about transcending the pleasures of sex from the bedroom into one's life or studies. Interesting point, though I have yet to feel orgasmic about the bones found in Harappa or the mummy's linen wrapped body in Egypt ie if I'm not the one on the dig;)

Jokes apart I do get her point. We women apparently go into a trance when we experience orgasm, maybe its a little piece of enlightenment that we feel in those few precious seconds of pleasure that joins us to the life giving force of the universe and to feel that kind of high in whatever field we excel at and are passionate about would truly expand our horizons and make us Bodhisattvas ever so near the final stage of Buddhahood.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 11:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

Yesterday I went Lingerie shopping to my favorite boutique called Underlines. Everything there for once was on sale and that too at 50% off. Most of the night gowns and pjs of my size were obviously sold out since most Indian women are of my size no matter what the pressures put forth by society may be but there was still stuff around for me to whip out the plastic as the bill was too high for me to pay in cash.

Apart from the regular stuff like undies and bras I picked up a pair of pretty but functional pjs, a nightie with a gown and a rather sexy dark colored satin nightie.

My younger sister was kind of surprised to see me wearing the sexy nightie, It was as if she had forgotten that being a mom of two didn't mean that I had given up the right to feel sexy. I was slightly miffed but bought the nightie any how.

Returning home I showed my stuff to my mother and the satin nightie was the last to be shown. She didnt blink an eyelid but merely said "Oh, this you will wear in your bedroom." In other words - This you will wear for some extra curricular activities in your bedroom.

It seemed kind of weird showing my mom the lingerie I had bought with sex on my mind just as it was rather weird for me to make an appointment with an OB-GYN who happens to be my sister's mother in law.

Sex with all its trimmings remains a topic I rather not directly discuss with the elders even when they have sound advice to share.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

Today the eunuchs came over to bless my children and danced for over an hour. They took about 10,000 bucks from my mom as extortion money er....money rightfully owed to them for me getting married, having kids, going and coming back from the USA and for waiting outside my mom's gate every sunday for the five years that I was gone.

Yet there was grace and joy to be found in their presence. They laughed with us, made eyes at the men and blessed the children present. Our neighbors came over to enjoy their dance and to negotiate the amount of money that was to be given to them.

It was a fun filled hour. Below are some more pics of the menfolk getting mauled by the harbingers of good fortune for all despite being considered as the rejects of society.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 08:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

The food was delicious and Rajori Garden looked very different from what I remembered. Sitting with my niece with Parita sleeping on my shoulder.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 12:03 PM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (0)

Now all of us fatties ...I mean people with imperfections can buy the lastest HP camera which instantly trims the pounds of the camera subject. No need for tummy tuckers or crash dieting- one click and skinny for life. Yeah- wouldn't we all like that- meanwhile only a moron with low self esteem or one struck with a neurotic streak of vanity would buy such a product.

In other news Mr slightly younger than Hefner Jack Nicholson wants to play a mean old mobster who has sex with three sex bunnies using sex toy. The bunnies and the toy sounds sexy but a flabby old bull dog humping in the middle? Shudder...probably would increase the sale of Viagra amongst the dirty old men.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 04:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

Delhi has been in the middle of some traders' strike since yesterday. Numerous people have been hurt and a seven year old kid died when an unruly crowd clashed with the cops. Processions will be taken out starting from today against the Congress Government and the Courts for their strict actions against encourchments, basement offices, illegal stores etc.

In this tug of war between the traders its the public that suffers. In yesterday's bandh even the pharmacies were closed and my daughter could not get her chest infection medicine though we tried numerous places. My sister was caught in the worst jams that Delhi has seen, my mom couldn't go to work and I was a traveller itching to hit the Delhi malls but had to sit out the heat and anger of the traders.

Today again I find myself twiddling my thumbs at home, well, I'm twiddling and twaddling in an air conditioned enviornment to be precise but being a delhiite means being a complusive road hitter. We spend most of our time either eating ,shopping ,watching movies, socializing or shopping again.

But life in some sense has come to a standstill since no one of really know which part of Delhi could be hit by the mob. So, while some delhiites are facing the uncertainities with aplomb, the cautious ones however are facing days ahead colored with idleness and inconvienences.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 03:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Tomorrow night I will be heading towards Hastinapur aka Indraprastha aka Delhi for three weeks of fun and frolick. I've heard from family and friends that Delhi is no longer the city of my past, lot has changed, new flyovers, roads that wind in confusing directions and a brand new metro; the pride and joy of delhiites.

I will be putting up snaps of my travels in and around Delhi and of Calcuttta..oops I mean aka Kolkata with a single t.

Stay tuned:)

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 01:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

On my site I generally talk about the fun aspect of sex- kinky , normal , naughty , you know the lighter stuff. But there is a darker side to sex. The yang of the sexy yin is the sexual exploitation of young children, so heinous is the crime that it goes beyond being mere sexual acts to being deeds driven by pure malice and criminal intent.

Its been a couple of weeks since I have been following a story of an eleven year old girl performing oral sex on more than ten males in the basement of a Milwaukee house. Today it was reported that there was a woman present at the time who did absolutely nothing to stop the crime.

Twelve males have been charged till date. Twelve men and one eleven year old child? What the fuck? What has this world come to?

It blows my mind when shit like this goes down and it is happening even in the richest, snottiest neighborhoods. Point is how do we protect our children?

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 02:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

Yesterday while waiting for the traffic light to turn green my eyes fell on a woman crossing the road. She was wearing a black hijab with little rhinestones dotting the borders of the black cloth. Feeling the weight of my stare, the woman turned and looked at me. Our eyes met and I was struck by the enigmatic beauty of her hidden secrets. She could be been as plain as a door nob or a ravishing beauty.

Yet there a charm in the unknowingness, it was a novelty rarely seen in today's overexposed world.

I'm not saying that we women should go back to the world of purdah and sit in harems in order to win back the romantic allure of the past but a little bit of modesty, of keeping our skirts atleast till the knees, of being a little more choosy about who we lie with, would not only be good for our self esteem but would also do the men some good.

But then again who am I kidding - skanks have always been around since time and memorial, sermons like these get nods only from those who already adhere to them;)

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 02:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

In an effort to disarm their husbands and boyfriends the Columbian women denied their men conjugal rights till they gave up the tools of their trade- their guns

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 09:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

I am so tired of getting rid of spam both on Desicritics.org and my own site. My nemisis are Tramadol and some porno site called alice. Now I'm not going to click on the URLs to see medications or penis and vaginas so why spam me with the same crap over and over again.

Suspended Moment's comment section is rammed with a Spamster called Adjustable Bed. I get spammed atleast twenty times and the clean up is a pain especially on Suspended Moments since I might miss a comment or two as they all come as Form Submission into my inbox.

If I use Type Key or some other programe to stop this spam shit it might keep my readers away from commenting who as it are stingy with their comments

But all that spam - phat arse, butt plugs, penis enhancers have me up the wall. Whoever is sitting in some spamming sweatshop may they break into hives with each site that they spam!!

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 04:28 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

For a mere $299 one can join the Mile High Club. Couples would be provided with ear phones and kitchen timers. The service also includes custom made beds, sheets and a bottle of Champagne. Cheap price for cheap airborne thrills;)

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 09:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

A couple of minutes ago a swarm of mosquitoes descended upon me and there was a bloody feast with me playing the unaware host. So engrossed was I in my writing that only after the bites became big fat irritating bumps did I realize what had happened.

I had been bitten badly- about five bites including two on my right heel and one under my big left toe. I washed my feet with cold water, put cream, coconut oil and then scratched, scratched and scratched, till an idea came to me- Toothpaste!!

And it worked! So, next time you find yourself a victim of someone else's dinner soothen the pain with Colgate Gel:)

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 01:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

She was born a macaca; brown like a slippery eel, pugged nose, large doe like eyes, small forehead; all in all bland features- no different from those of her native land.

The fair blue eyed children stared at the stuffed corpse that looked back with dull life less eyes. The cold steel bars froze their five year old fingers as they looked into the showcase which was as big as a room.

Her name was Reema and since she was the last of her kind, we had her embalmed and put on display amongst the other extinct species. She belonged to a race that was no different from their cousins - the apes. The cold detached voice droned on as the kids studied the display.

"My mommy said even pigs were cleaner than them." a little apple cheeked boy snickered to a miniature Dorothy who giggled back at him. Her indigo blue eyes surveyed the scene with  clinical detachment.

Reema stood before some sort of a three wheeled vehicle with a garish yellow top and black bottom with a caption- autorickshaw/three wheeler. Her hand was stretched out and the voice droned on to describe her action - Reema is begging to feed her diseased family as did the majority of her kind. Her matted hair, dirt streaked malnourished body reflect signs of poverty which we finally managed to eradicate along with this species.

The little apple cheeked ruffian continued to talk to his playmate in a loud whisper "My mommy's been here and said that this display is called the Road Display" and he pointed out to a little gold brass plate that boldly stated - South Asian Road Display and spelt it out - trying to impress the little girl with his know it all attitude.

"Shhhhh....." another luminous cherub tried to shush the petulant boy who stared him down and continued "You see the grayish ground? It was paved with what they called cement and those big round orbs in rectangular boxes where called traffic lights. This species was so backward that they needed rules to keep them in order"

Reema belonged to a species so inferior that they need laws and fear of unimaginable consequences to keep them in order.

The mechanical voice re-enforced the words of the boy

"See, I told you. Watch! ...it gets even better." he nudged the girl excitedly.

Dorothy stared at the desperation itched on Reema's face and felt a twinge of pity. Reema was to stand foever under the cool yellow beams stripped of dignity and grace. She could just as well have been naked in her distress.

The macacas were taking a heavy toll on the planet's resources. Their lack of social consciousness was the cause for their doom. As depicted by Reema, majority of them lived in poverty and yet continued to breed rapidly. Their social order collapsed when the gap between the rich and the poor became unbridgeable and the poor rose in revolution against the rich.

To reinforce the fact- Reema's begging hand fell and the other brown hand emerged from the dark and hit the wax figure driver of the three wheeler with a brick.

The children gasped and childish chuckles rang through the silent museum.

Dorothy, somehow felt uncomfortable and broke away from the group and walked towards the next display.

The sensors picked up her presence and a voice spoke up-

The yellow people or the slit eyed pygmies......

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 07:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Come on people, we all know not to wang the willie in public or better still not to use your microsoft email id when answering a lewd ad on Craig's List. Apparently, a whole bunch of lust driven dimwits not only used their real pics when responding to a sex ad but gave their contact details which can be googled.

It's hilarious, one couple asked their name to be brought down since they live in a conservative, church going community.

And BTW, the links provided on the site that I have linked to has some real ugly pics that you wouldn't want your ofifice crowd to take a peek at;) Warned ya!!

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 01:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBacks (0)

Since reading has sucked away my creative juices for the time being I have found myself crawling and trawling sites of unusual interests. Some are informative, others kind of kinky and some plain weird.

Here are a few of my favorites, some known and other getting there-

themuslimwoman.org - is an informative site that keeps us abreast with women's fight for equality in the muslim world. Life behind the hijab isnt easy yet with a little bit of ingenuity the women find ways of enjoying certain activities taken for granted in the liberal world and at other times the grim realities reported makes one ponder over the suffering and resilent spirits of these women.

Snippet: La Femme: Egyptian Beach For Women Only

In the year 2004, Moustafa launched his first venture by kicking off his much-speculated project of the first exclusive women beach, Yashmak and two others as well. They were an instant hit......

Spread across the northern coast of Egypt, this beach is equipped with everything from bright women staff, stunning belly dancers, DJ’s, chef, and the cautious watchdogs, the women bouncers who stay guarded at the entry gate, so that no men can sneak in.

The women get in all dressed in long sleeves and ankle-length designer skirts, but once they are inside the private space, they throw off their Hijab, and puts on sexy two piece dresses, I mean to say the colorful bikinis and dive to the beach......

Huffingtonpost.com - Arianna Huffington is known for her vivacious beauty but also for her aggressive, witty democratic views. When she is not wowing us with her grace and nasal accent on Bill Maher she can be found along with her guest columists on Huffingtonpost.com.

Snippet: 30 Amazing Things about America once it becomes part of the new Caliphate

Rosie O'Donnell will be in a burkha

George Clooney will have to permanently keep his Syriana beard

We can finally stop talking about 9/11 and those stupid conspiracy theories (but Cheney is still to blame)

We no longer have to wait till drunk to blame the jews

You save the equivalent of $300 per year on toilet paper

Honor killings give you something to do on weekends

Flogging courses taken during the summer counts toward college credit

Women aren't allowed to drive, unless accompanied by a suicide bomber


Jason Calacanis - Jason is the CEO of Weblog.Inc . Now, that says a lot, doesnt it? Initially I was a bit lukewarm towards his site but slowly realized that he had much to say to a non techie, non net fanatic chick like me.  Instead of lauding his company 24/7 (as done by Infosys) he talks about a whole bunch of other quirky things like number of digg hits or movies that refused to No!! ( though I wouldnt be found watching those movies) people getting personal with others of celebrity stature etc.

Snippet: The Discovery Channel Killed Steve Irving

This summer I realized that Discovery channel was out of control when I Tivo-ed and watched all of "Shark Week." One show, "Sharks: Are they Hunting Us," was one of the most irresponsible pieces of television put on the air. The "naturalist" named Dave Salmoni, who does not even know how to SCUBA dive (hello?!), decides the only way he can answer the question in the title of the show is to free dive skin dive with--wait for it--great white sharks.

(blogger note: thanks for the free/skin diving correction guys--I knew it was the wrong term, but they kept using it on the show)

Free diving Skin diving means without a cage. Over the course of the show this reckless idiot, who is struggling with his scuba gear in shallow water, gets up close and personal with seriously dangerous sharks. This idiot is known for another special, Into the Lions Den, in which he almost gets himself killed--you guessed it--getting up close and personal with lions. .

Xeni Jardin - Yeah, she is a real hot blond adventuress, co-editor at boing boing and has many other achievements under her belt. But it's been her recent travels in India that has been of much interest to me especially her coverage of the Tibetans exiled in Dharmsala which happens to be in the prettiest parts of mountainous Himachal Pradesh.

Snippet: Tibetan Soldiers in Indian Army

One of the less-known divisions of India's military is the elite division Establishment 22. The unit is stationed along India's northern frontier (near China's border) in the country's most treacherous and extreme mountain terrain, and is comprised primarily of ethnic Tibetans. A source in Dharamshala says they're now known as "Special Frontier Force," and that India's government tends to keep them cloaked in some degree of stealth. Link to a website with some interesting background.

Alright, here is where my attention wanders towards other things as does your's I'm sure.

Will put up the kinky/morbid ones in the next trawl, since I'm not too sure whether weird stuff mixes in this lot.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Currently I am inbetween reading about four books at the same time. Tales of Otori by Lian Hearn, Passion India by Javier Moro, The Occult- Colin Wilson and The Wicked Women of the Raj. Obviously what little time I get now days is devoted to reading, result? Blogging is suffering...BIG Time.

Its weird, when I blog I dont get the time to read and vice versa. The only thing that remains constant is my movie watching hour. I have to see atleast one movie a day - could be crappy or an exciting one.

Any how, I wrote a sequel to Stephanie the Lazy Town Slut and though I got massive readership into a couple of hundreds but zero comments. Stat counter showed people spending time on Suspended Moments but no comments for once (I usually get atleast ten a day).

Whats up with that people? I am a comment recieving whore, I don't believe in art for arts sake but art for appreciation sake...told ya...I like getting compliments or even getting booed on my stories.....so speak up and make yourself heard.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (6) | TrackBacks (0)