When I drive my fifteen years old Maruti 800 I feel like a goon rapaciously plundering an aged whore. The car, bless her mechanical dying soul, has been resuscitated more times than I care to remember by Good Samaritan motorists and has been my mode of transportation for me for past six months since our return from the US.

Due to my fear of big cars I don't like to drive Aaman's swanky new Esteem. It’s too big, though in American terms it’s a med sized car, less squeezable through heavy traffic and way too low on the road.

My old lady, on the other hand, needs a complete overhaul, starting with fresh paint, new tires, battery, radiator, leather seats and the list goes on but driving her rattling body makes me feel like the queen of the road for I can accomplish all my tasks from being a mom collecting her kid from school, buying groceries, meeting clients or just driving into the city to enjoy some 'me' time.

But for all my gratitude and appreciation towards her generally compliant service I hate her! The car has a sneaky habit of getting back at me by breaking down at all the wrong moments, at traffic light signals, just when I’d be pulling out of a parking lot (which happened today at Russell Market) or give me the silent treatment by not starting at all.

And I would be left at the mercy of nearby motorists who may or may not be willing to help me out. Generally, however, Bangaloreans have been a kind lot to me and got the moody bitch revving her engines within an hour or so with a polite request that I dump her and get a safer mode of transportation.

Our mechanic shop knows the car and me well.

“Mrs Lamba, you’re back, again. Why don’t you get a new car?”

Sure, a new car would solve my problem but buying two new cars in the same year goes against my pragmatic soul that believes in saving. Why get an expensive whore when the old is still functioning?

I’m behaving like a pimp bent on making his last buck from his whore but, then, all said and done, for all my false bravado and attitude of taking undue advantage of Bangalorean kindness, the car needs to be put to pasture and I need a freakin’ new car!