If you dont whoop your kid's ass you will be going against God's will. No more naughty corners for the kids but wacking them is the divine solution.

"Corporal punishment is not something you do to the child, it's something you do for the child," said Bethel Pastor David Sutton, who wrote the pamphlet. "Your goal as a parent is to correct the child or get him back on the right path."

The Bethel Baptist Church firmly believes in the concept of beating kids with flexible rods and sticks. Of course they are nice enough not to approve of verbal abuse when beating a child.

"People think all we do is turn our kids into hamburger or that we don't love them," Brandenburg said, adding that the church strongly prohibits using insulting language toward children. "The thing is, it's fair and we're not hurting them in terms of injuring them, and afterwards, the guilt is gone. The kid doesn't have to sit around and think she might be a pig."

It seems these dumb zealots do not realize that Christ was against violence in all its nasty forms. Or maybe they do have a point if Mary had whooped Jesus's arse repeatedly maybe he would have grown up to be a good Jew boy and run the family business of carpentry instead of running around the countryside with no good jobless fellows and a hooker to keep him company.

In other Christian news the T-rex is believed to be a coconut eater till Adam decided to have sex with Eve. From then all hell broke loose.

A new museum in Petersburg, Kentucky greets visitors with a 20ft tall tumbling waterfall and at its base, mannequins of frolicking children play amongst dinosaurs. The Creation Museum, which cost $25 million to build, is home to many unusual sites: a diorama of ancient people overshadowed by a towering T. rex, Adam and Eve swimming in a river with giant reptiles, and even a scale model of Noah's Ark.

It seems Noah solved the problem of fitting dinosaurs into his vessel by only taking baby dinosaurs. Indeed, the ark has a detailed display of many animals happily boarding the boat: dinosaurs cavort with giraffes, penguins, hippos, and bears.

Talk about getting innovative Bible lessons on Sunday.