While watching the movie - Reign Over Me I realized what Ruvy said in his article- Life And Death In Jerusalem to be so true- Americans are stoic in their grief and yet by virtue of having gregarious personalities find the unspoken grief spilling in their lives. Charlie Fineman loses his family and in his bid escape his tremendous loss becomes dysfunctional but he is made to face his demons by his friend Don Cheadle who despite having a loving family and roaring dental practice feels incomplete without male companionship. The relationship is mutually beneficial and the message that 'no man is an island' comes across subtly.

Another movie with similar overtones is The Hawk Is Dying . Paul Giamatti playing a car mechanic who tries to train a red tailed hawk and having failed numerous times finally manages to train the hawk while trying to come to terms with his nephew's sudden death. The grief that George Gattlin suffers is so raw and personable that even the hawk is not immune to his pain.

Is there beauty to be found in grief? Its an emotion that once surmounted makes people wiser and more subdued than before. It makes people compassionate towards those suffer similarly and in many ways value life even more.

Ruvy in his post describes an Israeli funeral in a heart wrenching manner:

It was here that you could see the people of the village of Ma'aleh Levona and the village of Shilo knit and pull themselves together, as grown men cried and wept out loud, inconsolable in their weeping. My sons, used to the stoicism and denial of emotion that encompasses so much of American society, could not believe this. My younger boy commented that he had never seen nor heard grown men cry so hard and so loud.

The final prayers were said, and one individual, the father of the young man who had fallen asleep at the wheel said the final remarks, asking the forgiveness of Aviatar for all that he had done, before the ceremony ended with the bereaved father reciting Kaddish once more.

For many, faith ties them over and for others, families and friends help dull the pain. And, then there are those who become estranged or defensive when grief overtakes their saner selves. It is with people like these that we have to become mute, by our very silent or non intrusive presence we are able to tide them over like Don did in Reign Over Me and the wild red tailed hawk did for George in the movie- The Hawk Is Dying.