There are songs I love to hate. They are songs I love so much that I cannot bear them for the memories they bring back hurt too much. Most of the seventies songs and early eighties songs remind me of the times when we girls took road trips with my dad and mom. We kids would be sitting at the back of the mammoth white Ambassador with my dad behind the wheels singing the songs loudly and my mom smilingly and wincing alternatively as he'd speed and overtake from the left.

Songs such as Illusion, Get Down On It, those by Abba, Boney M, Carpenters, BeeGees and by the Jackson Brothers and then by Michael Jackson's Thriller and Billy Jean continue to hurt to this day.

The Ghazals and songs from Hindi movies continue to have the same effect on me. Why? Its been over nine years and yet I cannot face so many songs. I get transported back to those times when we were the most happy as a family, a complete unit.

They remind me of the times when I saw my dad dancing and being ever so slightly tipsy, kissing my mom , kissing us. His eyes would be twinkling, his lips smiling and his feet tapping and body swaying to the music. He loved life, he loved music and he loved pain and laughter in equal measure.

So many songs are shunned by me. I love them and I hate them. They are the memories I rather not face.