Things That Bang

When do we let the government infringe on our freedom in the name of security? Bangalore is already going down the slippery slope of becoming a police state. Prohibition will probably be knocking on our door soon enough and we will lose our right to make adult decisions if we do not protest.

The State considers us to be children who need to be kept in line. The chief minister probably believes that only the laws of the land can keep us in line. He is against the pub culture. He blames the night life for drunkard accidents.

But closing down the pubs will not stop people from getting drunk nor would the extreme step of Prohibition stop people from smuggling in alcohol and getting high. It will only make matters worse.

When a state curbs freedom, citizens find insidious ways to rebel. A couple of months ago while sitting in an empty pub on a Friday night, I complained about lack of 'happy hours' where we could leave our worries behind and dance the night away and a nearby person who eavesdropped on my conversation talked about rave parties that went on in Farm Houses.

There were places one could go to have fun. I felt like a naive twenty year old. Why was I so surprised that people had found ways to go on living the lifestyle they wanted to despite the risks posed?

I've never been in favor of rave parties. A lot can and does go wrong in rave parties. They don't provide the sense of security one enjoys in a pub and the young adults can easily be roped into the drug culture.

In places like Delhi and Mumbai, rave parties are quite common (and illegal) but then the young can choose not to go there and hit the regular pubs and discs. When the choice is not there, however, we may just be sending our young to the slaughterhouse in the name of protecting them.

Apart from rave parties, the young of Bangalore now hit the dhaabas where nasty incidents are known to happen and many have been reported. Going across the border to get drunk is a sure way of letting death hitch a ride in the backseat. Unfortunately they have become the norm since the pubs have become boring and the discs shut down.

Bangalore is a city of youth and the youth work hard and they want to party hard. Thats the way the young are. Suppression invites rebellion, its the age old teen knee jerk reaction.

Party they will but in all the wrong places and we will have only ourselves to blame.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 01:15 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

The third episode of MTV Roadies: Hell Down Under in Udaipur (no Australia?) made for a sobering viewing. The ugly side of human nature was laid bare.There was slander and assassination of character, physical brutality, cussing, blatant racism and lack of respect of cultural differences. 

Yes, all the typical Indian vices were laid bare, where two people who spent time alone naturally became the target of gossip. A girl's character was assassinated, the girls judged the woman in question and the boys congratulated the man who had the supposed tryst.

We've all seen it play out in our schools and colleges. The woman is called a slut for being 'forward' or 'liberal'. The sexist game at its worst being played out by the supposed globalized generation had me shake my head. India still had its mind in the gutters.

Then came the term- Chinkie! I cringed. Chinkie?! And my mind went back to the recent conversation I accidentally eavesdropped on a few days back when a man had called a North Easterner a hot chinkie. We still have a long way to being politically correct in our thinking, words and actions.

The cat fights continued with a man thrown in like a wish bone to be fought over.

Then there was the snide immature politicking to get a guy beaten up by another hot headed jack ass. 

Weight jokes were made, a woman verbally assaulted an overweight guy and another man passed a sexist remark that she should be let off since she was a girl.

A man made a mockery of a folk dance and finally the hotel was turned into a hoodlum boarding house by the crew of the show and by the team members, who placated the hotel staff when they were asked to leave the premises..

I haven't taken any names here deliberately. These were acts committed by Indians , these were acts we see happen all the time in our society, we read about them, we fight over them and we find ourselves either perpetuating them or being the victims.

The ugly underbelly of India was laid bare in all its festering rottenness and the episode left a sour taste in my mouth.      

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 11:07 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

The third episode of MTV Roadies: Hell Down Under in Udaipur (no Australia?) made for a sobering viewing. The ugly side of human nature was laid bare.There was slander and assassination of character, physical brutality, cussing, blatant racism and lack of respect of cultural differences. 

Yes, all the typical Indian vices were laid bare, where two people who spent time alone naturally became the target of gossip. A girl's character was assassinated, the girls judged the woman in question and the boys congratulated the man who had the supposed tryst.

We've all seen it play out in our schools and colleges. The woman is called a slut for being 'forward' or 'liberal'. The sexist game at its worst being played out by the supposed globalized generation had me shake my head. India still had its mind in the gutters.

Then came the term- Chinkie! I cringed. Chinkie?! And my mind went back to the recent conversation I accidentally eavesdropped on a few days back when a man had called a North Easterner a hot chinkie. We still have a long way to being politically correct in our thinking, words and actions.

The cat fights continued with a man thrown in like a wish bone to be fought over.

Then there was the snide immature politicking to get a guy beaten up by another hot headed jack ass. 

Weight jokes were made, a woman verbally assaulted an overweight guy and another man passed a sexist remark that she should be let off since she was a girl.

A man made a mockery of a folk dance and finally the hotel was turned into a hoodlum boarding house by the crew of the show and by the team members, who placated the hotel staff when they were asked to leave the premises..

I haven't taken any names here deliberately. These were acts committed by Indians , these were acts we see happen all the time in our society, we read about them, we fight over them and we find ourselves either perpetuating them or being the victims.

The ugly underbelly of India was laid bare in all its festering rottenness and the episode left a sour taste in my mouth.      

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 11:00 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

The pain really did begin down and under. And it was the type that had men on bended knees. And they took it like men between the legs. The wacks landed on the balls while they wore nothing more than their boxers.

That's what it means to a Roadie - to have balls of steel!

Did I get put the cart before the bull or was it a Pushkar camel?

MTV Roadies- Hell Down Under seems to have turned gorgeous Rajasthan into a simmering desert of politicking, kitty fights, shit picking rigor, ball-whacking terror and tears of sadness.

The Roadies were divided into green and blue teams and the war began from then on. Their first task was to pick up animal shit - cow dung, camel dung (one Roadie even touched human poop) at the Pushkar animal fair and whichever team picked the maximum poop got fifty grand in their team's account.

Bobby's team won the round and consecutively they won the next round(which granted them immunity against being voted out) as well where they had to interpret words spoken in pure Hindi. And for the generation that grew up with Hinglish the price for every wrong answer was payed not by the girls but by the guys who had to take the punishment between their legs and boy did it hurt bad.

We sat and watched with horrified expressions. The whacking was painful and the girls empathized with the the boys of their teams with every answer they got wrong.

The tasks were fun to watch but more so were the fights Gurmeet found herself embroiled in with other girls. Back biting, cussing and boys holding Gurmeet back from beating the girls in question into pulp made the show worth watching. The woman has a mouth that would put even a sailor to shame. Come to think of it no sailor worth his salt no matter how many years spent on the sea alone with his mates would want to spend a minute with that feisty babe much less do her.

Which is why when the voting out of one of Gurmeet's team members came up Puneet from Bobby's team gave her the right to have her vote be counted twice over. And as it happened one of the strongest member of Gurmeet's team- Varisha was booted out and Paulami the head nodding brainless sweet twit remained.

Gurmeet it seemed to be under the delusion that Puneet was siding with her. Little did she realize that not only was he looking out for his team but more so for being the last to be left behind - for him to be the Roadie of Season 6.

Gurmeet is a team breaker and yet none of her mates had the balls to vote her out. Why? the question remains and sweet booted out Varisha knew they had cooked their goose well.

MTV Roadies - Hell Down Under is slowly cooking the little froggies well in the broth of future fame and money. How far are these children ( as Bumpy from the crew called them) willing to go and at what cost?

By the way Bumpy Baba, the director of the show also took the rap between his bright red Boxers just to make sure the ball-whacker was effective. And it hurt like hell.

The ball-whacking activity was the idea of none other than Raghu the imp.

The show is worth staying tuned to and has me hooked. Darn it! that girl Gurmeet has me hooked line and sinker with her shrewish temperament.

Yes, you Gurmeet. You are a rowdy but a Roadie? That remains to be seen.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:51 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I used to consider TV game shows to be below my dignity. Yeah, add your idol frenzy to it or that damn dance Nach Baliye type of crap till one fine day my husband made me see two bald men take the trip of goonks who had come to audition for MTV Roadies - Hell Down Under. (I woke up to the show on the sixth season; shame on me)

I watched them fuck around with people who could best be classified as losers (of course there were exceptions) with dreams of being the next Roadie in their eyes. Raghu and Rajiv, the two bald twin brothers had this strange synergy between them that only twins apparently have. They picked up each others' conversation as if they knew what the other was thinking and they ripped apart the participants' self esteem within a matter of few minutes and that too in classic Hindi vulgarity that I so love.

Some left with tears in their eyes. Yeah, well, they had been warned. The two brothers weren't there to make social chit chat but to select people who had nerves of steel and sadly the one who truly was Roadie material in my books was voted out in the first episode itself- Sufi.

It was obvious why Sufi had been voted out. The man had the makings of a Bollywood hero. He had camera presence, seemed to be a man of stable character and integrity. When he was voted out he said he wanted to use the money to help build his parent's business. His words seemed genuine and I felt bad watching him go.

But a man like Sufi seems to have the will to make it big and I sure hope to see him make it big in Bollywood.

There are three other people I have taken a liking for - Bobby, Roop and baby faced Sandeep.

Bobby and Roop seem to be the only girls with intelligence in the show and I especially liked the way Roop took Gurmeet's trip.

Gurmeet tried her best to project herself to be a hip girl with a devil may care attitude but she turned out to be a chicken shit babe unable to deal with criticism when it came at her headlong from Roop. At the truth or dare game she tried to put Roop in a spot but when Roop turned tables on her she pulled the - 'I don't want to play this game' shit and had the other contestants guffaw.

The less said about Gurmeet the better. Actually the less she shows of herself the better for the viewers. Her bulky curves in tight t-shirts and thunder thighs in tiny shorts are complete eye sore. But the one person who beats Gurmeet hollow is Paulami.

Paulami thinks she is da bomb! Wait! she thinks she is a Bipasha look alike and thinks she is the best dressed and hottest babe amongst the Roadies. Fact is anyone who meets Paulami would die to ask her if her plastic surgeon had botched her face.

The woman looks like witch out of one those horror Ramsay brother flicks but even witches are allowed to think they are hot- its a matter of self esteem and who am I to disabuse them of these notions.

The women of substance on this show are Roop and Booby. They are witty and can easily take the other women up and shred them into bits and on Roadies cat fights are always hot especially when the air headed 'I am so hot' babes gets slammed by the real street smart goddesses.

The men become insignificant at that point. But the men I am rooting for are Sandeep and for Pradeep.

Pradeep is a street smart surd and knows how to manipulate his way through the game. He understands its better to have a wise enemy than a foolish friend. He sidelined Gurmeet when he backed up Roop. Gurmeet, he seemed to have realized was nothing more than a dumb babe with a loud mouth and he didn't want to be seen siding with her. Clever dude.

Sandeep till now has stayed out of controversy but been yakking a lot in front of the camera. I know this baby faced dude with thick Delhi-ite accent would not last on Roadies Down Hell Under but then again it would be fun to see how a gentle giant handles himself amongst poisonous snakes.

The other Roadies wanna be players are insignificant in my mind since they have not done much to get my attention. And for those who want to read up more on them there is stuff about them on the main site but it would do them good to get a bit more in the limelight because the audience doesn't care much for wall flowers no matter how pretty (yeah like Suzanne with her hooked nose) may be.

The behind the scene peek was also fun to watch and Ragu's departure was indeed a loss to the show but these people are weird enough to keep us entertained in Hell Down And Under for an entire season.

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 10:43 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Here is what's going around on the Satyam fiasco:
Raju Raju
Yes baba
Cheating us
No baba
Telling Lies
No baba
Open the balance sheet
HA HA HA

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 09:40 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Dee!? Dee? Are you sleeping again? Its only nine.

Huunh? What?

Go to bed! Go!

No! I am comfy here.

Dee, you can't sleep on the carpet! Go.

I grumble, get up, go to the bedroom and fall asleep only to wake up before the crack of dawn at 5:40.

I get up early, I sleep early, I stay away from sugar, in-between snacking except for fruits, some dry fruits and green tea. I stay away from late night partying, drinking soft drinks, alcohol and eating yummy food.

I am a classic case of a woman following a clean life. And it sucks! Everything is a big - No! I whine and I plead with my dietitian - Wine?! Can I have red wine everyday with my dinner?

Her eyebrows go up.

I ask again- Every other day?

Her eyebrows remain up there trying to hug her hairline

Er... Once in a week?

She finally replies - Yes and that too only 60 ml.

60 ml? Why don't you kill me already? I groan

You have to lose 1 kilo per week with balanced diet and rigorous exercise. And no late night partying it screws up your metabolism rate.

She goes on talking and I realize my lifestyle has done a complete spring cleaning.

She called me at about 4 this evening.

Deepti, Hi! Were you sleeping?

Er! yes, I was.

Oh I am so sorry I woke you up but try not sleeping in the afternoons.

But! I crashed out. I was reading one minute and the next talking to you.

How is your diet going? You didn't show me your diet diary.

I am not eating sprouts.

Deepti, you have to lose one kilo per week. You have to follow the diet.

That means eating more than I am used to.

Well, eat then!

We talk a bit more. She stresses on the need to be mobile during the day and sleep early at night and the call ends.

I get craving for chocolates instead bite into Digestive biscuits and have Chamomile Tea.

My trainer calls.

Ma'am day after can you make it at 7:30? We will do Cardio, circuit training and weights as well. I saw your work out chart we have four more days left to lose 1 kilo. Tomorrow strict two hours cardio. Try burning atleast 600 calories. We will talk more at length tomorrow morning.

Yes, my trainer talks the 'We'. Its a combined goal. I shouldn't make him look bad, I shouldn't make my dietitian look bad, I shouldn't let the rigorous program look bad, I shouldn't look bad!

My poor body is not used to clean living or eating. When I grumble they talk about heart attacks, High BPs and Sugar problems, the falling gut, the weak back and the list goes on.

Ma'am you have to work out and eat right. It has to be a lifetime habit. Have you started having soups before dinner?

Why are you people trying to stuff me?

You eat more, you lose more. Trick is to exercise and eat right. 1 kilo, Ma'am.

I dream 1 kilo. I dread 1 kilo.

Life has all of a sudden become all about me. I drink my tea and wonder how can I exercise a bit more with my kids. The one kilo looms over my horizon.

The phone rings for the third time.

Dee? Hi! How are you?

Its my sister.

We talk a bit. And she takes me to task

Are you doing your prayers?

I hem and haw, beat around the bush.

You know, you have to take care of yourself. At least one hour per day. Its important to keep your focus right. 1 hour Dee. It shouldn't be so difficult. Truth be told you should do 1 hour in the morning, 1 in the evening. You have to take care of yourself.

1 hour, I kilo! Yes, its all about me- physically and spiritually.

My mom calls and wonders whether along with my exercising I am taking care of my skin, my hair and my feet?

I now dread a call from my best friend.

She would next ask me what I am doing to take care of myself mentally? What am I reading? I am writing? Am I dreaming? Am I enjoying myself daily?

Yes, the world is telling me that I have to take care of myself. I just didn't know it took so much effort to do it!

Posted by Deepti Lamba at 09:21 PM Stumble It! digg this del.icio.us Fark It | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)