Things That Bang

Dee!? Dee? Are you sleeping again? Its only nine.

Huunh? What?

Go to bed! Go!

No! I am comfy here.

Dee, you can't sleep on the carpet! Go.

I grumble, get up, go to the bedroom and fall asleep only to wake up before the crack of dawn at 5:40.

I get up early, I sleep early, I stay away from sugar, in-between snacking except for fruits, some dry fruits and green tea. I stay away from late night partying, drinking soft drinks, alcohol and eating yummy food.

I am a classic case of a woman following a clean life. And it sucks! Everything is a big - No! I whine and I plead with my dietitian - Wine?! Can I have red wine everyday with my dinner?

Her eyebrows go up.

I ask again- Every other day?

Her eyebrows remain up there trying to hug her hairline

Er... Once in a week?

She finally replies - Yes and that too only 60 ml.

60 ml? Why don't you kill me already? I groan

You have to lose 1 kilo per week with balanced diet and rigorous exercise. And no late night partying it screws up your metabolism rate.

She goes on talking and I realize my lifestyle has done a complete spring cleaning.

She called me at about 4 this evening.

Deepti, Hi! Were you sleeping?

Er! yes, I was.

Oh I am so sorry I woke you up but try not sleeping in the afternoons.

But! I crashed out. I was reading one minute and the next talking to you.

How is your diet going? You didn't show me your diet diary.

I am not eating sprouts.

Deepti, you have to lose one kilo per week. You have to follow the diet.

That means eating more than I am used to.

Well, eat then!

We talk a bit more. She stresses on the need to be mobile during the day and sleep early at night and the call ends.

I get craving for chocolates instead bite into Digestive biscuits and have Chamomile Tea.

My trainer calls.

Ma'am day after can you make it at 7:30? We will do Cardio, circuit training and weights as well. I saw your work out chart we have four more days left to lose 1 kilo. Tomorrow strict two hours cardio. Try burning atleast 600 calories. We will talk more at length tomorrow morning.

Yes, my trainer talks the 'We'. Its a combined goal. I shouldn't make him look bad, I shouldn't make my dietitian look bad, I shouldn't let the rigorous program look bad, I shouldn't look bad!

My poor body is not used to clean living or eating. When I grumble they talk about heart attacks, High BPs and Sugar problems, the falling gut, the weak back and the list goes on.

Ma'am you have to work out and eat right. It has to be a lifetime habit. Have you started having soups before dinner?

Why are you people trying to stuff me?

You eat more, you lose more. Trick is to exercise and eat right. 1 kilo, Ma'am.

I dream 1 kilo. I dread 1 kilo.

Life has all of a sudden become all about me. I drink my tea and wonder how can I exercise a bit more with my kids. The one kilo looms over my horizon.

The phone rings for the third time.

Dee? Hi! How are you?

Its my sister.

We talk a bit. And she takes me to task

Are you doing your prayers?

I hem and haw, beat around the bush.

You know, you have to take care of yourself. At least one hour per day. Its important to keep your focus right. 1 hour Dee. It shouldn't be so difficult. Truth be told you should do 1 hour in the morning, 1 in the evening. You have to take care of yourself.

1 hour, I kilo! Yes, its all about me- physically and spiritually.

My mom calls and wonders whether along with my exercising I am taking care of my skin, my hair and my feet?

I now dread a call from my best friend.

She would next ask me what I am doing to take care of myself mentally? What am I reading? I am writing? Am I dreaming? Am I enjoying myself daily?

Yes, the world is telling me that I have to take care of myself. I just didn't know it took so much effort to do it!